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Thursday, June 16, 2011

Everyday losses.




I watched my daughter "graduate" from 6th grade today. It was a great day and everyone was certainly happy that another school year ended and that summer is here at last. But there were also some sad faces in the crowd. Some kids will not be returning to the school next year; some teachers, too. And though people may have given it only a moment's thought, it was a loss that they felt inside.

We all have experienced loss. I certainly see the biggest loss when I work. Death is a huge loss, we all know that. But we have rituals and support groups and the outpouring of sympathy and concern to help deal with it. And we can cry openly about it and everyone understands. It is expected that we will grieve. It would seem odd if we didn't.

But what about the everyday losses that we endure? How do we deal with those.

The truth is that we don't. Not really. They seem too insignificant to matter to anyone. So we bury them. But I think that they don't really ever just go away. And I think that they affect us more than we realize.

It would seem silly to mourn a cancelled tv show that we really enjoyed. Or the death of a celebrity we admired our whole lives. Or a co-worker leaving. Or a friend moving to another street or town.

How about that bracelet you misplaced that was given to you by a favorite aunt. Or that tree you loved that was felled by a recent storm. Maybe you are even sad about a book series that ended and will never be written again.

The list goes on and on and we experience them each and every day and probably think well, that is just the way it goes and we leave it at that.
Or at least we think we do.

But then we may be a bit off for a few days. Or feel sad and we just don't know why. And the reason could be because we have experienced a loss that affected us, even though it seems silly to admit it or even say it out loud. But each loss is important no matter how small it may seem. And sometimes a lot of little losses can add up and become overwhelming.

So think about your everyday losses and embrace them. Feel them. Allow yourself to mourn them. A loss is a loss is a loss is a loss. Big or small, it really doesn't matter if it makes you feel bad.

Sometimes when I consider what tremendous consequences come from little things, I am tempted to think there are no little things. ~~~Bruce Barton

When you are sorrowful look again in your heart, and you shall see that in truth you are weeping for that which has been your delight. ~~~Kahlil Gibran

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